In teaching marriage classes and doing biblical counseling, I have found that the biggest problem with most couples is their
mouth.
In an effort to communicate, some speak their mind to the fullest extent, not realizing that every thought is not from God... not to be repeated... and, not healthy conversation.
Wrong words, finger pointing, accusations, negative outlooks, and hostile remarks only stir up strife. Friend, God's way is contrary to our impulsive, fleshly behavior. Self-control is a
must if you want to cultivate healthy relationships.
Learn to
listen more and
talk less. Practice being
slow to anger.
The devil is busy creating oppressive scenarios, throwing darts of skepticism and releasing the spirit of jealousy. His tactic is to get us offended. Then, once we are weakened by his evil blow, he assigns a horde of demons to fan the flames of anger, resentment, rage and wrath.
Don't allow the devil to push your buttons! Practice being quiet. Pray first. Talk second. And, speak in shorter, more impactful sentences that give God glory. Going on and on about a thought or feeling does not convince the other person of your need; but instead, only dulls their hearing.
THEY TUNE YOU OUT!
Long, drawn out, conversations of discontent only acerbate the situation.
Yes, many times, silence is best. In fact, the Lord promises to fight our battles for us - if, we will just trust Him. And, learning to trust God requires self-control.
James says we are to be
quick to listen,
slow to speak and
slow to become angry. Taking God's Word from the pages of our Bible to real life application can certainly be a challenge, but it is definitely doable. It all comes down to
prayer and
obedience.
Are you praying?
Are you seeking to be obedient?
Will you allow the Holy Spirit to have His way? Or, will you barrel through with patronizing, condemning, hateful and sarcastic words... because, you deserve it? Because you feel the need to vent? Because, it's just the way you are?
If you desire to have more friends, if you want to have a healthy marriage, or, if your goal is to be a person of influence, practice LISTENING.
Practice thought management.
Practice response delay.
Practice word filtering.
Every conversation does NOT require a response. Sometimes, silence is best. Learn to ponder thoughts more... and, speak less. God will increase your effectiveness in communication as you obey His precepts.
#Listen #SpeakLess
www.DeborahRossMinistries.org
